Friday, December 23, 2011

Handy Uses for Ex Husbands...

You might ask, "Wow.  I have this ex husband on my hands and well...he's kind of getting in the way.  What can I do?  Should I recycle?"  Don't just let him stand there in the middle of your life collecting bitterness...get some good use out of him!  There's plenty of ways to make that ex husband of yours as handy as your favorite spatula!

Doorstop - Who couldn't use a doorstop?  We ALL could!  Let the sunshine in and set that heavy little burden against that door.  You can even brighten him up with a little glitter or even rhinestones!

Hammer - Need to hang a picture on your wall but can't find your hammer?  No worries!!  Your ex husband's head is so hard you can use it to beat those nails right into the wall.  Wow!!  Now THAT is useful!!! 

Mailbox - Did those pesky kids tear up your mailbox again?  That's ok...set your ex husband out by the curb and use HIM as your mailbox!  His mouth is so big...it can even hold UPS packages.  Amazing!!

Fertilizer - Wishing you had red ripe tomatoes like grandma?  Have your ex husband stand in the middle of your garden and watch!  He is so full of shit your tomatoes will start winning ribbons at the fair!  Yum!

Coat Rack - Stop hanging your coat on the back of your kitchen chair!  Just place your ex husband in the corner of your living room or breezeway and throw that coat right over his head.  Doesn't that look better?  Why yes it does!

So many uses...try some of these at home and see what you think!

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